May 8, 2015 · 6 comments · Categories: Musings · Tags: ,

I recently bought Louise Hay’s book Loving Yourself to Great Health after reading a review on Awaken & Begin. It’s about the interrelationship between our thoughts and what we eat. Not only do we feel better when we eat healthier foods—our bodies also make more efficient use of the nutrients when we feel better about ourselves and thus continue to become healthier, in an ever-improving cycle.

One point that resonated for me was the relationship between gut health and feeling safe. Gut feelings are more than just a metaphor; the brain and gut really do communicate with each other. When we’re overly stressed, we feel it in the gut, and it’s likely to result in digestive issues such as constipation. Conversely, a gut feeling of being safe improves both mood and digestion. The book suggests affirmations and gratitude lists, as well as more nutritious foods, to feel better and become healthier. I decided to be more specific about listing reasons why I am safe, such as:

– I am safe because I have a loving family who will always help me.
– I am safe because I live in a well-built, comfortable home.
– I am safe because I have a low-stress job that provides for my needs.

I hadn’t really thought about it before I read the book, but there is a big difference between appreciating one’s blessings and feeling safe. The first doesn’t necessarily lead to the second; so although gratitude lists can bring about an improved outlook on life generally, they might not be enough to banish old fears.

For the past week I have been reminding myself every day that I am safe, and setting forth some reasons why that is true. I have in fact noticed some improvement in my digestion, in addition to feeling calmer. So, although reasonable minds can differ as to the particulars of the nutritional advice in this (or any other) book, I’d say it was well worth reading.

May 7, 2015 · 4 comments · Categories: Musings · Tags:

Deciding what annual flowers to plant is always fun in early spring, before the warm weather arrives. Last month, I had in mind that I was going to plant lantana next to my mailbox. But I looked at two stores, couldn’t find any lantana, and was getting a bit frustrated. Then I ended up buying mandevilla instead—just happened to notice it at the supermarket when I was doing my grocery shopping.
 

Mandevilla with red flowers next to my mailbox. 

It is a climbing plant, and I expect it will look gorgeous toward the end of the summer when it’s all over the mailbox post. I’ll also look upon it as a reminder to “climb” beyond my original expectations and always keep my mind open to finding beautiful things everywhere!

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

You know how great it feels when you’re shopping for clothes, and all of a sudden you see something beautiful on the rack next to a bunch of ordinary stuff, and there’s only one and you think “Please, please let it be my size,” and YAY, it is!

I had a memorable shopping trip like that in 1988 when I found a pretty white and gray blouse full of sparkly silver and gold threads, which was love at first sight and the perfect size for me.
 

Old blouse with silver and gold threads. 

The only thing I had to wear with the blouse was a cheap gray suit from Value City, which my mom had bought for me when I was still in school, but I expected that I’d buy a better suit to go with it. That never happened, though, because I spent a few years staying home with my kids when they were little and then got a job where I didn’t need to wear suits. I gave the cheap gray suit to a charity that was helping women on welfare to transition into the workforce, but I kept the blouse just because I remembered how happy I felt when I bought it.

Obviously, I’m never going to wear it again. Even if the material hadn’t gotten yellowed from almost three decades of hanging in my closet, it has 1980s-style shoulder pads, for heaven’s sake, and would look absolutely ridiculous with any of today’s fashions. Also, one thing I’ve learned over the past year while cleaning up my clutter is that holding onto useless stuff just because it has good memories is counterproductive. That causes unhealthy feelings of stagnation and takes up space, both mental and physical, which could be put to much better use! So I’m letting the blouse go, while reminding myself that whatever may come my way in the future, it’s all good.

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

I’ve had the phrase “let go of the outcome” in my head a lot this past week, when telling myself that uncertain situations would turn out for the best regardless of what might happen at a particular time. In keeping with that thought, and with the “consider the lilies” story that I posted yesterday, I decided to illustrate today’s entry with a photo of the daylilies next to my garage.
 

Row of four daylily plants, not blooming yet, under a gas meter. 

I planted them under the gas meter about 10 years ago, and they’ve been growing robustly ever since. One year the gas company dug them up to put in a new meter, and that left me concerned that they might not recover properly. But they came back the next year as healthy as ever; so, just as with anything else, I shouldn’t have wasted my time and mental energy uselessly worrying about possible outcomes!

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

April 26, 2015 · 2 comments · Categories: Musings · Tags:

Earlier today I found a bunch of fake flowers in a dark corner of my basement, literally, and carried them upstairs while trying to remember how the heck they got there. While pondering that question, and wondering what reason I might have had for keeping them, I put them in the sink to rinse off the dust. Next thing I knew, the fake color was coming off, and my sink was full of icky little spots of purple goo.
 

Bunch of fake flowers, mostly purple iris, next to my sink. 

I still have no clue as to where those flowers came from, and suspect that I probably moved them from our previous house and put them in the basement without paying any attention whatsoever. But there’s one thing I am sure about—I’ll know better than to do this again! Next time I discover ancient clutter around the house, it’s going straight in the trash without stopping to think about it!

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

Not sure how this happened, as these were supposed to be two separate groups of bulbs—but doesn’t it look like one of the purple flowers decided to do a bit of neighborly visiting with the white flowers?
 

White and purple spring flowers, with a purple one next to the white. 

This little scene left me remembering childhood wanderings through meadows full of wildflowers, making up all sorts of fanciful fairy-tale scenarios of what the flowers might be doing. I believe it would do us all good to exercise our imagination like that from time to time, even as adults!

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

April 22, 2015 · Write a comment · Categories: Musings · Tags:

In olden times, when an invading army was defeated and the war came to an end, the victorious defending soldiers would be paid whatever wages were due to them and sent home to tend to their families and fields. What if we did the same with our defensive emotions when our lives became more peaceful—honoring their service, while recognizing that it’s not in our best interest to keep them as a standing army? An imaginary mustering-out ceremony might go something like this:

Anger, step forward. Today we honor your valiant service. You charged courageously into battle, attacking wrongdoers and righting injustice. You kept your fellow soldiers motivated to go on fighting until victory was won. Here are your wages and a medal honoring your many brave deeds. May you find success in turning that impetuous energy toward a new career. How about the theater? It would suit your dramatics quite well.

Fear, thank you for your service as a vigilant scout, searching the countryside for dangers and quickly alerting the troops. Without your hard work, there surely would have been more mishaps and ambushes. Here is the money you’re owed—no doubt you’ll manage it just as carefully! Enjoy the pleasant, sunny days of peacetime on the farm, and try to relax if you can!

Bitterness, now it’s your turn. For many years, you honed your talents as a masterful propagandist. You made sure everyone knew the sordid details of the enemy’s evil schemes—and if they got exaggerated beyond recognition, well, that was all in a day’s work. Surely you’ll find great success in the advertising industry! Here are your wages, along with a commendation for having been so zealous.

Doubt, you were a fine quartermaster. Nobody got away with stealing the army’s supplies while you were on the job! You’ll certainly have many commercial firms eager to hire you. Here’s your bag of gold coins. Please try to wait until you step off the stage before you count them!

Judgment, your efforts are much valued. With diligent attention to detail, you kept us informed of all the ways we were better, smarter, and more capable than the enemy. You gave us certainty that we were always in the right—and that even if we weren’t, it was someone else’s fault. Word has it that you plan to start a new career in politics. Good luck to you, and here’s your well-earned pay!

As all of you receive your honorable discharge today, please know that your service to God and country is greatly appreciated—and as the times become more peaceful, may we find peace in our hearts as well.

April 19, 2015 · 4 comments · Categories: Musings · Tags:

Here’s one of the reasons why there was such a mess in the closet where my kids used to keep their school supplies—that big heap of stuff on the floor was full of old backpacks and sports bags. Rather than throwing the well-worn ones away at the end of the school year, the kids just tossed them back into the closet. Then they sank to the bottom of the heap, never to be seen again.
 

Two rows of old backpacks on brown carpet. 

Of course, as the responsible adult I should have made sure the old stuff was gone when I bought new school supplies every year. Learned my lesson there: Not paying attention to what goes out (or doesn’t) when new stuff comes into the house equals clutter! But all’s well that ends well—the closet is back to life. No more Bermuda Triangle for backpacks here!

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

Last year I bought a crystal necklace that became a favorite string of “worry beads,” as I described in a previous Nurturing Thursday post. Sadly, all my fidgeting with the necklace had its inevitable result this morning when the string broke and the beads started falling all over my desk!
 

Necklace of crystal beads with a broken plastic string. 

The necklace can easily be fixed of course, but having it suddenly fall apart like that was kind of discombobulating. Then I thought that maybe I should look at it as giving me a message that all is well, and there’s no need to worry about anything today!

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

Today’s world is far busier than at any time in the past. Everywhere we look, we’re faced with many choices to make and complicated details to track and organize. It’s no wonder that so many people lead lives of constant stress, always worrying that there’s too much going on and no good ways to keep up with it all. Making wrong choices, losing track of things, and not getting enough done seem inevitable.

Of course, anxiety only makes everything worse; but if we don’t feel in control of our daily lives, then how can we get those worries to go away? And until the worries go away, how can we feel more confident? Many of us struggle with this dilemma. It can be especially challenging for people with disabilities, whose needs are by definition (under the social model of disability) not adequately supported in present-day society.

Autism, in particular, often is associated with anxiety. Definitions of autism generally mention self-calming repetitive behaviors. Many people view such behaviors not as an intrinsic part of their autism, however, but as symptoms of anxiety caused by living in a world that can feel overwhelming and extremely difficult to navigate, with information often coming too fast to process.

I believe that it’s helpful for any of us, whether or not we have a disability, to keep in mind that we do have the power to change our personal environment. Even though we can’t control much of what happens in the world, we can create peaceful, nurturing homes and workspaces that lovingly support us as we go through our days. We can awaken our power by making small positive changes to our routines and surroundings, which reinforce and build on each other as time passes.

When I feel stressed about something I’m trying to do, I stop and ask myself: Does this need to be done now, or at all? Are there more comfortable ways to do it? Should I ask for help instead of trying to do it myself? Sometimes anxiety makes us forget that we have other options; but in reality, there are almost always better alternatives, if we take enough time to discover them. Rather than letting ourselves get overwhelmed, we can step back from the situation for a moment and consider ways to simplify it.
 

April is Autism Acceptance Month. Visit autismacceptancemonth.com for more information.