A few days ago, I put on a long-sleeved shirt and brown leather vest that had been sitting at the bottom of a dresser drawer for several years. Although I seemed to have lost interest in wearing them, I was not sure why. They had been a gift from my husband; and as far as I could tell, nothing was wrong with them.
 

Greenish-brown long sleeved shirt with leather vest. 

But as soon as I had them on, they felt all wrong immediately. Although I still wear the same size and these clothes were not actually too tight, they seemed constricting in an emotional way. I felt like I was wearing armor, which reminded me of stress from old attitudes about having to tough things out (as described here). So, because they give me no joy, they are now in a bag for the thrift store, along with my blessing that they will help someone going through tough times.

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

The frigid winter two years ago was hard on my roses. Three bushes, weakened by the extreme cold, caught the rosette (also called witch’s broom) virus last summer and died this year. I ordered bare-root replacements and planted them with fresh topsoil and mulch last weekend. Here’s a photo of one:
 

Bare root rose freshly planted. 

Next spring I’ll have three tiny new bushes in the same flowerbed with larger existing ones, which will look peculiar at first; but I expect it won’t be long before they grow big enough that I can’t tell the difference! That’s often how things go. Even if something happens that is bad luck and a nuisance, there’s no reason to get stressed about it because in a year or so, it will all be forgotten.

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

I had an odd dream Friday morning in which people started wishing each other “Good baby steps!” That meant making slow and steady progress, without time pressure or worries. When I woke up, I realized it was just a dream and our busy, fast paced culture had not really changed. But it left me thinking—what if people really did expect to go through life in a spirit of adventure, with plenty of time to do anything we might want, as if we were babies just learning to walk?

Toddler taking steps on a brick walkway.

(Creative Commons image via flickr)

Instead of rushing to get through our projects, we would see them as fun opportunities to create and explore. We wouldn’t obsess about money and status, but would simply trust that the world was full of abundance and that we’d always have enough to meet our needs. If something didn’t work out, we would pick ourselves right back up again and keep on going, without any self-judging thoughts about failure or whether we should have done better.

If we wanted a toy, we would just think about how to get it, rather than worrying that we might not be good enough to deserve it. And when we got it, we wouldn’t be self-conscious about being happy in the moment. We would feel comfortable with taking breaks when we needed them, napping when we got sleepy, and looking around when a pretty bird or an interesting idea flew by.

Yes, it was just a dream; but I’d like to believe that it gave me a tiny peek into a more joyful future. So I’ll say to all my readers today: Wishing you good baby steps!

I knew I’d have to get around to this one eventually, whether I wanted to or not—the stuff that lurks in the closet under the basement stairs. Christmas stuff is stacked up on the left, there are sports bags including some road race freebies to the right, and my husband’s old boxing gloves and other sports gear are heaped up in front. I have no idea how a mini vacuum cleaner, which hasn’t been used in years, ended up in there.
 

Cluttered closet under the basement stairs. 

Rather than nag my husband to clean up his junk, I’ve been working on other areas of the house and leaving that closet for another day. That day will soon arrive when it’s time to take out the Christmas decorations. I plan to take everything out of the closet, give it a good vacuuming (the mini vacuum might turn out to be useful after all!) and tell my husband that if he wants to keep any of the old sports stuff, it needs to get bagged up neatly in the freebie sports bags.

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

The credit for this week’s self-nurturing topic goes to Elizabeth Gilbert. In her bestselling book Eat, Pray, Love, there is a scene in which she describes going to a soccer match in Italy and taking notes on a spectator’s colorful cursing because she loves the sound of the Italian language so much. She mentions that there is no good English translation for “che casino,” which literally translates as “what a casino,” but has a meaning closer to “what a mess.”
 

Bright neon casino sign at night.

(Creative Commons image via flickr)
 

After reading that book, sometimes when I realize that I’ve let myself get into a “what a mess” mood, I say out loud “Che casino!” in my best fake Italian accent, dripping with exaggerated pity. That’s almost sure to leave me giggling and take the seriousness out of the situation! Although we all get into bad moods on occasion, humor can be a very effective way of dealing with them.

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

There’s a cabinet in the basement where I never put anything. When I opened the door recently to see whether any random items might have ended up in there, I found several mostly empty bottles of liquor left over from my daughter’s twenty-first birthday, when she and her friends had a tiki bar in the backyard and played Hawaiian party music.
 

Mostly empty bottles of liquor in a cabinet. 

She is 23 now, and I suppose I should count myself lucky that she is so uninterested in liquor that those bottles sat there for more than two years, totally forgotten!

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

October 17, 2015 · Write a comment · Categories: Musings · Tags: ,

Instead of going on holiday, a phrase that brings to mind adventurous excursions in long-ago fanciful tales, here in the United States we simply take vacation—that is, we remove our rear ends from our desk chairs and vacate our workspaces. Vacancy is a rather dull way of describing time away from work; and what’s worse, often those vacation days don’t even include play or relaxation. Instead, they are used to catch up on postponed chores and projects.

That’s not to say we shouldn’t work on creative projects or fix things around the house while on vacation, if that is what we genuinely feel like doing. Personal projects, when they’re moving along easily and without stress, leave us feeling refreshed and joyful. But often that’s not what happens when we have an overflowing to-do list at the start of a vacation week. All that mental clutter interferes with relaxing and builds pressure to get things done while we have the time. Even things that ought to be fun end up feeling like chores. Lurking like spiders in gray dusty corners of our minds, those to-dos keep on spinning their icky little webs of time pressure and anxiety.
 

Spider in its web with a gray background.

(photo credit: publicdomainpictures.net)
 

When I started writing this post, I noticed a few of them peering out from their usual haunts. “Better hurry up and get finished, otherwise there might not be time to do it for days,” chuckled one big fat imaginary spider, well fed from sucking the life out of things that should have been fun. Another whispered from its dim dark hidey-hole, “Writing that post is taking so long—wouldn’t it make more sense to check a few chores off the to-do list instead?”

I told them to shut their collective yap. Then I set the half-finished post aside, picked up my Kindle, and spent some time reading NeuroTribes by Steve Silberman, a thoroughly researched historical work setting forth the various perspectives on autism in the modern era. This bestseller is a fascinating book, filled with engaging anecdotes and richly detailed descriptions that bring the cultural context to life. I serve as a board member of a nonprofit organization, the Autistic Self Advocacy Network, which is briefly discussed toward the end of the book; thus I’ve had the privilege of becoming acquainted with several people the author mentions.

After I wrote this post’s first few paragraphs, I actually did take days to get around to composing the rest of it. That wasn’t caused by an overload of chores, but was simply a result of other things (some fun, and all good, yay) that ended up getting my attention instead. When I sat down to finish the post, I wondered why I had ever imagined there was any reason to hurry. My reasons for blogging are, first, to reflect on my experiences and clarify them in my mind; and second, to share with others and make a small contribution toward creating a better world. Neither of those purposes is well served by rushing through my posts.

Usually I take vacation days in November and December, and this year will be no exception. But unlike in the past, as I go into this year’s holiday season I intend to make sure that those pointless old time-pressure scripts don’t spoil the fun. I’m going to sweep the dusty cobwebs out of my brain, send the imaginary spiders on their way, and hang out a “No Vacancy” sign!

My husband recently asked me to leave cookies off the grocery list because he had been eating too many of them, which was best dealt with by an “out of sight, out of mind” diet. Over the summer his employer got acquired, and he ate more cookies because of stress without realizing it. Many people do that, of course, as shown by this word-art picture I got in an email from a coworker last month.
 

Cookie Monster saying "Today me will live in the moment unless it's unpleasant in which case me will eat a cookie." 

Many years ago, Sesame Street changed the Cookie Monster to the Veggie Monster out of concern that kids shouldn’t be encouraged to eat sugary snacks for comfort. Although I can’t picture the Veggie Monster inspiring kids to clamor for lima beans, the health concern is indeed valid, given that today’s diet has way too much sugar in it. But even though it’s best not to overindulge, I have to admit there are times when nothing beats a soft gooey fresh-baked (or microwave-warmed) chocolate chip cookie after a tough day!

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.

There is an old expression, to hat someone up, which means to send them on their way; it derives from giving people their hat when the time has come for them to leave. This week it came to mind when I looked up at the top shelf of my closet and noticed a stack of hats that I used to wear for gardening and other outdoor activities, to keep the glare out of my eyes. I realized that those hats had been sitting there gathering dust for years because I now prefer to wear prescription sunglasses instead of hats on sunny days.
 

Stack of hats on a closet shelf. 

It’s all too easy for closet shelves to fill up with stuff that once was useful, but hasn’t been touched in ages. Sometimes it’s because of a conscious decision that it might one day be useful again; but more often, it’s simple inertia because the stuff has been there for so long it doesn’t even get noticed anymore. However it might happen, that clutter just needs to get hatted up!

About Clutter Comedy: Every Sunday (which I envision as a day of rest after a productive week of de-cluttering) I post a Clutter Comedy article describing my most memorable clutter discovery of the week. Other bloggers who wish to join in are welcome—just post a link in the comments! There’s no need to publish any “before” photos of your clutter, if they are too embarrassing. The idea is simply to get motivated to clean it up, while having a bit of fun too!

Saturday was a chilly day here, with some rain showers. I was outside for part of the day and was glad to get back home, where I could warm up! When I looked out the window by the front door, I noticed a rabbit on the steps, looking perfectly comfortable. My first thought was that the rabbit wanted to get out of the wet, too!
 

Rabbit sitting on my front porch steps. 

I didn’t invite the rabbit in for tea, like in old-fashioned storybooks, but I did take a photo as a self-nurturing reminder. While it’s good to get outdoors and be active, having a warm and cozy house to come back to later is always something to appreciate!

Nurturing Thursday was started by Becca Givens and seeks to “give this planet a much needed shot of fun, support and positive energy.” Visit her site to find more Nurturing Thursday posts and a list of frequent contributors.